The historical roots of aperitifs and digestifs date back centuries, mostly to Italy and France, where the roles they played in a diner’s experience were mostly physiological. Aperitifs were meant to stimulate the appetite and prepare the stomach for food, while digestifs (as their name implies) were meant to help with the digestion of a meal.

These days, the goal of pre- and post-dinner drinks is just as much about the social aspect of an “evening out” and enhancing the overall experience of a meal, says Layla Neuroth, owner of Färmǝsē (pronounced “pharmacy”) in downtown Asheville, a cocktail lounge within walking distance of several award-winning restaurants.

One of the signature pre-dinner cocktails at Farmese

“An aperitif before dinner can make conversation easier once you’re at the restaurant, especially for first dates,” Neuroth says. “Nobody wants to sit awkwardly across from someone for a full hour and try to find things to talk about.”

Similarly, when the meal is over, “diners are conscious of sitting at an empty table and taking up space at a restaurant on a busy night,” Neuroth says. “When they want to keep the party going, they head out for an after-dinner drink.”

We live in an era where food and drink lovers are often encouraged to ignore convention and gravitate toward what they like—rules be damned—but there are some generally accepted guidelines for aperitifs and digestifs.

Aperitifs tend to be lower in alcohol than typical cocktails, dryer and maybe even slightly bitter. The idea is to avoid drinks that overwhelm or dull the palate. Popular options include vermouth or a dry wine. One of the more iconic pre-dinner sips is a Negroni, made with Campari, gin and sweet vermouth and garnished with an orange peel.

Neuroth also recommends an Aperol Spritz, a cocktail made with prosecco, Aperol liqueur and a splash of soda water. “It’s light and gives your stomach an easy feeling.” Another good option is a Moscow Mule, made with vodka, ginger beer and lime juice. “Really, you just don’t want to be weighed down with something heavy,” she says.

Layla Neuroth at Farmese

Located on Biltmore Avenue, just steps from Pack Square in downtown Asheville, Färməsē welcomes a pre-dinner crowd starting around 4pm, while the more lively post-dinner set starts to arrive around 8. “If you’re going to go through the effort of getting dressed up, you might as well make an evening out of it,” Neuroth says.

Neuroth recommends arriving for pre-dinner drinks at least 45 minutes to an hour before your restaurant reservations, with enough time baked in for the walk or drive to get to where you’re going. “You don’t want to be slamming anything before dinner,” she says. “Give yourself enough time to sip and take things slowly.”

After-dinner drinks, meanwhile, have historically contained herbal or botanical components to help with digestion, with a higher alcohol content than pre-dinner drinks. Another common adage is that digestifs are dark and served neat, like a brandy.

Neuroth says her clientele often gravitates toward desserty options, like Espresso Martinis or drinks made with the coffee liqueur Kahlúa or Baileys Irish Cream. A signature option at Färməsē is “The Infused,” made with vodka, a toffee-almond-infused cordial and walnut bitters.

So what does Neuroth herself drink for bookends around a meal?

“I’m a bourbon drinker, so I’m usually having a Manhattan for a pre-dinner drink. After dinner, I’m probably having the same thing. I make mine with Amaro, which has a lot of medicinal properties. And then during the meal, well, yeah, I’m probably having a Manhattan,” she says with a laugh. “You can really just drink what you prefer.”